A great idea

The president-elect hasn’t even been sworn in and he is already being attacked by the Democrats. I think they haven’t given his ideas a chance. Donald Trump has some great ideas. One that got my attention was his idea to lower the speed of light to 60 mph. Light travels at like a thousand mph. Why do we need light to go so fast? Going that fast no doubt helps heat up the atmosphere through friction. That’s probably the greatest cause of climate change.

I never need light from lights a thousand miles away. I only need lights from things that are close. When I flick the switch in my dining room, the light is less than eight feet away. I don’t need light hitting me at a thousand miles per hour. It’s only going six feet. At 60 miles per hour, light travels at 88 feet per second. If I am only eight feet from the bulb, the light will reach me in less than a second. That’s plenty fast, and no global climate change effects from such slow moving light.

I sometimes rely on light from more distant objects like street lights. Light poles are probably around 80 feet tall. The light will still reach me in less than a second.

Movie theaters shine lights on screens. Movie theaters are probably 800 feet long. When the projector starts showing the movie, it will take the light less than 10 seconds to reach the screen. I don’t mind waiting in the dark for 10 seconds before the movie starts. That’s long enough to steal a kiss from my date or shovel in a couple handfuls of popcorn. That 10 seconds will be a benefit for everyone and will save theaters money. And, say it with me, “No global climate change from such slow light.”

The one challenge I can see is driving, but since I sometimes drive faster than 60 mph, even at night, I would arrive at my destination before the light arrived. That could be a problem if someone was already parked in my space. Two solutions come to mind: One technical and one legal. First, car manufacturers could put an extra light on my car. With two headlights, the light would travel twice as fast, so the light would arrive before me and I wouldn’t accidentally hit the car parked in my space. If that adds too much to the price of the car, Trump could tweak his Light Speed Limit a little and allow light from headlights to go faster, maybe 80 mph. If we give the president-elect some rope, he’ll solve all our problems and make America great again.

Dan Mason