Footsteps to Follow: ‘A virtuous woman,’ by Pastor Kathy Behrens, of Picture Rocks and Tivoli United Methodist churches
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In celebrating Mother's Day, some churches in the past may have focused on being a wife or mother rather than on the lectionary-based scripture readings. One of the texts we would read would be Proverbs 31:10-31, which describes a virtuous woman.
Over the years, the idea of what a typical mother is has changed a lot. Mothers were always the helpmate to the father. She was the one who stayed home and cared for the family. The family, Biblically speaking, may typically have consisted of a mother, father, and possibly children. The husband worked outside the home, and the wife or mother worked inside the home. Many people have no idea what that means today.
There were exceptions. Women may have continued to work to support their families, especially when the husband or father went to war. Others had to pick up the pieces after a workplace accident when their husbands were injured or killed. This was in addition to the work women did inside the home. Many times, women did not want to compete in a world with men, but they worked as a necessity.
When my husband was in the military, we saw many women who had moved faithfully with their spouses from one location to another and then were left high and dry by husbands who left them. The women paid a high price for the one-sided decision of their spouse.
(There are also parallels between God and his relationship with all of us, which are described in human terms, but I do not have time to go into all of them with this article. God is described as the father, and the spouse of Jesus Christ is the church. Jesus is like a good husband who is willing to lay down his life for his love and he did.)
Some scripture translations of Proverbs 31:10-31 use the term "noble woman," and others use the term "virtuous woman." If she has virtue, she is seen as having a high moral character. She is faithful to her family and responsible. Proverbs 31:10b-11a states, "she is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her." Verse 12 says she brings her family good, and not harm, all…her life.
A lot of women still work with their hands making clothes, blankets, etc.
She shops for what her family needs, "bringing her food from afar" (14). Verse 15 describes her getting up while it is still night; she provides food for her family. Some women still plant gardens. Donna Summers would have said, "she works hard for her money."
"Her lamp does not go out at night…she opens her arms to the poor" (18b, 20a). I have known women who would take the money they saved by using coupons and donate it for the church or missions.
She makes warm clothes for her children in the winter. Because of her, "her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land" (23). Verse 25 tells us "she is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come." Then verses 26-31a state, "she speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband praises her: 'Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.' Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise."
This is the ideal model of a virtuous woman, meant to be celebrated in scripture. When the ideal model of a Biblical family is rejected, it can lead to issues in our society. My hope is you have memories and love of the one who mothered you.
Happy belated Mother's Day.
Pastor Kathy Behrens, serving Picture Rocks and Tivoli United Methodist churches